Today’s expedition was vertical, all the way to the 6th floor. I live on the second. Yesterday when I came home carrying my eggs and other things I bought at the grocery store I found two Amazon packages in the mail room. I was expecting two Amazon packages. Because I was carrying things and wearing a mask I didn’t want to put my reading glasses on. The light is good in the mailroom and with a little effort I could make out my name on one of the packages. I saw my apartment number in sharpie on the other and picked it up too. As I knew what was in them I was in no rush to open them. I opened one before I went to sleep because it felt light. I thought that Amazon might not have given me my full order because of shortages. Instead it was a bath product for women. I figured it was my roommate’s, but I put my glasses on just in case and saw it was for an apartment on the 6th Floor. Then I realized that wasn’t my apartment number in Sharpie but just part of the building address that is my apartment number backward. I felt terrible about this and today I brought it up to the 6th floor, left it at the apartment door, and went down the stairs. I wasn’t trying to avoid taking responsibility, I was social distancing. I left a note in the box with my name and apartment number along with an apology. When the wrong apartment got my coffee, they did not have the same courtesy. They kept it. My parents brought me up better than that.
I bought eggs yesterday because I was out. I have eggs for breakfast every day. What was I going to do? Take advantage of it by making one of my favorite dishes, peanut butter, and bacon on toast. I pretty much only make it when I’m out of eggs. It was one of the best things I learned in grad school; the coffeeshop next door to the school served it. I love peanut butter and I love bacon, but I never thought of putting them together till then. Now I learned; try peanut butter with anything and try bacon with anything. I have now mentioned three of the four essential food groups, coffee, peanut butter, and bacon. Who knows what the fourth is? This is easy, I talk about it often. It’s chocolate! I’m out of chocolate. Well I do have chocolate syrup. That does count. I made an egg cream last night. This is why I never catch anything; I have a protective diet. I’m fortified with coffee, chocolate, bacon, and peanut butter; COVID-19 doesn’t stand a chance.
I haven’t decided whom to call today. Should that be “who?” Without the “decided” it’s easy; I called whom. “Whom” is clearly the object in that sentence. This always gets me. I suspect My Gentle readers will disagree on this one. I’m going to tag some English majors and have them fight it out. If we’re lucky it will become a knife fight that we can watch play out in the comments. I said that as a joke but just thinking about it made me feel bad. I don’t mean people literally knifing each other, I just mean getting overly adamant. I don’t want my friends to have anything but a friendly fun argument. Or for them to agree that I’m right. If they agree that I’m wrong then I will take it as a learning opportunity. I will not cry and pout. At least I won’t tell you if I do.
This is short so I’m using an old fallback, writing a poem. I used to do this often. I’m rusty and not taking my time but it’s better to write poorly than not at all.
There once was a virus, corona
That spread from Wuhan to Daytona
It’s passed through a cough
Touching is now a turn off
Instead of a hug I’ll just phone her.
Wise Madness 