Sorry I’ve been missing in action. I’m going to skip Friday and not write about what I did today. Instead, I’ll launch into the epic saga of the wedding of Dan and Anna. I did what most people do the morning of an afternoon wedding, I went to the hospital for an infusion. I played it safe and went in my wedding clothes in case the infusion ran long. I was the only one at the infusion center in a sports jacket, dress pants and shirt. I held off putting the tie on. The medical procedure was a success, I made two of the nurses laugh out loud. I even got a snort! No matter what else I accomplish in life few things give me as much gratification as making someone laugh.
My appointment was at 10 and my train left at 1:15, it takes 20 minutes to walk to the station. The actual infusion takes only half an hour but with the prep and waiting figure an hour, plenty of time. That is if they took me at 10. Instead, it was closer to 11:20 and I got out at 12:25. It turns out I would have had time to go home and change quickly but I’d have felt rushed, especially as I thought the train left at 1:05. As I was walking to the station, I found myself singing Get Me to the Church on Time from My Fair Lady. That was not quite appropriate as it was a Jewish Wedding at a farm. That inspired me to listen to Fiddler on the Roof, the centerpiece is a Jewish wedding. Anna is an aficionado of classic Broadway, so this was all quite appropriate.
The wedding was in Sharon Connecticut, where is that? Far from the Bronx. The one saving grace is that the Metro North line I needed is the one that is near me. It still took three trains to get there. I had to get off at Wassaic, the last stop on the Harlem line. It’s so far north that the tracks aren’t electrified. The third train was a diesel. The train portion of the trip was 2:50, that would leave me just enough time to cab it to the farm for the ceremony. That’s when everything fell apart. There was a line of cabs waiting, typical for a train station that runs only once every two hours. What was not typical is that they were all being used for an event. That was every cab in the area. Arrgghh! I tried Lyft which I installed just for that contingency. I got a message that said there weren’t many drives. Not many became none. Fortunately, the guy from the cab company said he’d send someone back for me. He was true to his word but that was a half an hour wait. I arrived during the ceremony but had to stop long before the farmhouse so as not to disturb the outdoor ceremony. I arrived just as everyone was going inside for the reception. This was terrible for me but perhaps fortunate for Dan and Anna as I don’t know if I could have resisted objecting.
“If anyone knows any reason that they two should not be joined in holy matrimony, may he speak now or forever hold his peace.”
“HE’S NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR HER!”
Don’t worry, I wouldn’t have done that. I just enjoy thinking about it. I’ve wanted to do that since I was a kid. The reality is that I’ve never heard anyone ask about objections at a wedding.
I just glommed on to the end of the line of the crowd as they entered the building. Nobody realized that I wasn’t there. As people asked me, “Wasn’t that a beautiful ceremony” I had to say, “Sorry, I missed it.” This is hearsay so not allowed in court but for blogging purposes I feel it’s safe to say it was an unusually moving ceremony. I talked to Dan’s brother Noah and sister Autumn as they got water; they both said that they were dehydrated and had to replace all the water they lost as tears.
Something spooky, Dan’s relatives who I never met recognized me. Between Dan posting pictures of me on FB and even more the film that Noah made about me, I’m famous in the Rauchwerk family. You didn’t know there’s a movie about me? That’s not a joke, it was a student project of Noah’s. Now on to the important thing, food. Dan’s a vegan and I worried about finding anything to eat. My favorite part of a wedding is the pigs in a blanket, yes, I’m a blatant sentimentalist. I don’t consider a wedding as legal without them. They didn’t! But they are still married as there was Korean barbecue short ribs and duck. Those are acceptable substitutes. There was plenty of other good food to. The main course was the best roast chicken that I’ve had. It was made in a truffle sauce, heirloom chicken, and not overcooked. One of my early blogs was about a wedding and I said that I’d be disowned by my family if I didn’t start by talking about the food. I have maintained that tradition.
It was a gorgeous day, sunny, not to warm and not too cool. I was perfectly comfortable in my suit. The main meal was in a tent adjacent to the house. Early on Anna’s maid of honor started to give her speech. Immediately the skies opened up with a deafening rain and wind. Even with the PA system we had to struggle to hear her. Sharon is not that far from Hillsdale NY where Falcon Ridge is held. If you’ve been to the festival, you know exactly the kind of storm that hit. My thought was that if the were going to get married under a tent in a storm they should have had it in The Budgiedome. Noah’s and Autumn’s speech was postponed until things quieted down. When it came it was well worth waiting for. It was the best wedding speech I’ve heard. It was both uproariously funny while still being moving and heartfelt. It was my platonic ideal of a wedding speech. Noah knew that I’d love the ribbing of Noah. Anna says that we don’t talk, we just make fun of each other.
I sat at a table with the few non-relatives I knew, Michael and Jordan. I suspect I was about as old as any two of my tablemates. I was not at the old people’s table. I had a lot of fun talking to people though I got confused every time Michael said Jordan’s name. We are trained to hear our own name in the midst of a cacophony.
I didn’t dance much. They didn’t do a hora and I didn’t have a date for a slow dance. Most people didn’t dance with anyone, they just danced. I used to not dance at all, I guess I still have some dancing issues.
The cab driver left me his card and I arranged for him to pick me up to make the 10:15 train. It was still raining, and we didn’t make it clear where I was going to get picked up. He didn’t drive to the door because it wasn’t clear which door I was at. But we finally connected. I liked the driver, so it didn’t bother me. Being personable counts for a lot.
Once again there were three trains, I got home at 1 AM. That was a long day but well worth it. On the way home I did listen to My Fair Lady. It was a classic Broadway commute along with Mahler’s 8th symphony and the baseball game. I have a lot to say about Fiddler and My Fair Lady. But that will have to wait for another time. I didn’t take any pictures at the wedding because I decided to take part in the festivities not record them. I know you can do both, but I also knew that I’d be tempted to hide behind the camera and didn’t want to do that. The photo was taken by another wedding guest.
Wise Madness 