Girding My Loins

I decided it’s better to write late than never. Instead of following blogging with breakfast I’ll follow it with dinner. Of course, that means I have to decide what I’m going to write about. I could write about Trump pardoning Flynn but there is no point. Nobody needs me to tell them how wrong that is. You already know or deny it. I’m avoiding reading things whose purpose is to enrage me, so I certainly won’t write anything like that. There is enough anger in the world. There’s too much.

I wrote something long yesterday, today I will probably keep it short. Today’s expedition was to buy potatoes, or should I say Po-Tay-Toes, the Gaffer’s delight.

When I was taking a walk, I found that one of the small stores sold bags of potatoes for $2.50 and made a mental note to buy them their next time I needed them. After putting it off for days today I went out as I had no potatoes left in the house. While I walked I did my first mask wearing survey in months. I discovered that things have improved. On the way to the store I passed 68 people properly masked, 8 nose peekers, and 19 unmasked. That translates to 80% at least partially masked and 72% properly masked. I bet that’s enough to lick COVID-19 if everyone everywhere did this and didn’t congregate indoors. As long as parts of the country aren’t careful it will keep coming back.

Last night’s dinner was peppercorn pork loin. That was amazing. I’m having leftovers tonight, and again tomorrow.  How have I gone so many years without this being a staple? It’s the same cut as filet mignon is on a steer. It’s so tender you can practically cut it with a fork. I love being reminded how much I can love food. I might be clinically depressed, but I know how to appreciate what I have.

My next Gord’s Gold is going to be about Carolann Solebello. I have spent today listening to her music on shuffle. I usually find myself listening to music as background. That’s not good. Writing Gord’s Gold makes me give the music my full attention. I plug my earbuds into my computer, close my eyes, and listen. That way there are no distractions. I’m also listening as I write this. I will listen more when I wrote the piece. Sometimes I write about musicians with new band smell. That’s not Carolann; she is musical comfort food, bacon, not loin of pork. She is also human comfort food, an old friend. The familiarity can make writing either easier or more difficult. Familiar music and people can be like the air, vital for living but not something that stimulates your senses, you are surrounded by it. Sometimes the writing becomes easy if the right triggers come to my brain. The air is always around me but sometimes I notice the smell or feel the breeze on my face. I bet that My Gentle Readers, all have strong memories of air. It’s just a matter of separating them from the background.

I did something I rarely do, I blocked someone on Facebook. Most of our interactions became them misinterpreting what I said in my posts and then scolding me in the comments. Months ago, a friend asked me why I don’t block them based on seeing what they wrote on one post. I don’t like blocking. I like to think the best of people. I will often unfollow people but stay friends but that wouldn’t work on someone that insists on commenting on my posts. I finally asked a mutual friend why they thought I needed to constantly put in my place. I thought it might be some sort of misunderstanding. It wasn’t. I was told to not think it means I’m something special, the friend acts that way with everyone and their own family has blocked them. That was enough for me. The friendship was not giving me joy so was tossed out. I still feel bad about it. Being told that it was not about me in some ways made it worse, it meant there was nothing I could do about it. The friendship wasn’t fixable. I wonder if the person will ever notice that they aren’t seeing my posts anymore.

There’s another friend that I would very much like in my life but that has consistently rebuffed my efforts. When I communicate, even if it’s something that I know they have a strong interest in, the response is a monosyllable. It took me a long time, but I finally decided that I had enough. I did not unfriend the person. If they ever want to renew our friendship I’ll be delighted. What I did was unfollow them on Facebook and Instagram, so I’m not tempted to initiate contact. I don’t need the pain of the rebuff. My therapist congratulated me for my self-care. It doesn’t matter how big the steps are as long as they are in the right direction. That’s my mantra. Do you know where that’s from?

Now it’s time to make myself a baked potato and then when it’s done heat up my pork loin in the microwave. The plan for the rest of the evening is to write Gord’s Gold and then record it. I have to keep a week ahead.